Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize