When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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