let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
