this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
