I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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