I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
