and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
