She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Randomize
