would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Randomize
