ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Randomize
