Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
