what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Everyone says I win the strip club
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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