Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
