so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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