I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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