Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
