i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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