You're my little dorito
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
