In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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