plz talk dirty to me
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize
