actually, I'm a sock model
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Randomize
