My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
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