Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
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