I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
