My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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