so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize