You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
