did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
My underwear smells like fireworks.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize
