Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
