On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
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