I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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