dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
