with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize
