Dual....:-)
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
