brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Randomize
