we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
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