i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
