Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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