can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
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I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
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If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
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