Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM VODKA MAN
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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