We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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