I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Are we still banned from the library?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
It all started with a game of naked twister.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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