I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.