went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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