don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
