There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Randomize
