Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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