I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Randomize