Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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