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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?

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• (607): View more from New York

  You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me

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• (917): View more from New York City

  Sober January is a disaster.

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  27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (504): View more from Louisiana

  All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them

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• (406): View more from Montana

  I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised

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  23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (913): View more from Kansas

  Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.

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• (250): View more from British Columbia

  Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.

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