i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
handjob tips. give me some.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I believe in your delicious
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Randomize
