I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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